Are You Your Own Worst Enemy? 4 Silent Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Success—And How to Rise Above It! Self Sabotage Tricks

​Self sabotage…..the annoying little reflex inside of us that loves to see us fail and repeat the same toxic patterns we constantly find ourselves in.

A reflex whose signs are so quiet, you don’t even think they’re your own doing.
Some sneaky little sabotages might even make you believe they’re actually helping (when they aren’t). 

And as you’ll soon read about, a lot of tendencies were placed within you by someone who decided their trauma belonged in you …… or by an event that scared you so deeply, that it etched an echo of pain upon your heart that you still feel everyday. 

But thankfully, self sabotage doesn’t have to be a life sentence. 

Because once you understand the signs below and see why they might’ve come to be, you can then use the tools to fight it off and regain control over your life.

You’ll finally be free of you getting in your own way and finally become the person you’ve always wanted and hoped for yourself.

You are worthy of living a life free from old patterns that demand you to relive your worst moments and you are deserving of living a life full of growth and happiness.

Take control and finally be ready to stop letting old wounds destroy your present and future!
Or delay the growth and live in a world where the one person meant to love you unconditionally… hurts you?

I truly hope that you pick the road that leads to you finally loving and supporting yourself.  

Because once you no longer accept the unspoken “what ifs” of your untapped potential, you’ll finally be able to rise up and claim your divine power within!

Join the goddess movement and finally FEEL what it’s like to be a goddess!

Hello and welcome to the Goddess Energy Academy where I, Angel, help others awaken their power within to craft and create a life that is as beautiful and unique as the goddess that makes it. 

And one of the first steps to manifesting and keeping that life is the skill of being able to see when self sabotaging is bubbling up and taking the steps to stop the behavior before it takes control.

Signs Of Sabotaging

Signs Of Sabotaging

You are too worthy of growth and progress to allow your lower frequency self, sabotage you into not becoming the ideal version of yourself!

Self sabotage can stem from so many different reasons and you, like me, might have to overcome a few of them to finally break free.

Luckily not all of them are created equal so some might be easier than others to rid yourself from.

These are the most common ones but there are tons more so if you don’t see these as your sabotages, I would take this as a sign and start doing some research on the other ones and come back and let us know! You could help out another goddess who might feel the same 🙂

The road might feel hard at first but as someone on the other side of the hill cheering you on, I promise you it’s worth it! 

By healing this part of you, think of all the energy you will save by not having the same battles with yourself or other people anymore. Think of all the ways you can use that energy for good rather than reliving the same patterns.

You’re worthy of happiness and success so with that let’s get to the 4 Most Common signs!
4 Most Common Signs

​#1 - Your actions don’t match your inner truth.
This could look like when you know you want to stay in and cook because you’ll feel better, save money and work on a skill. But then, even though you have all the ingredients at home, you find yourself in the take out line getting that meal that will inflame you and spend the money that would’ve gone to your travel fund that you’ve been looking forward to for years. 

Possible Reason :

1. This could be from a lack of self trust thinking on some level that you won't follow through or don’t have enough strength or intelligence to get it done. Or you could end up building up whatever it is you want to become or do, to the point that it’s so massive that how could you even possibly achieve that goal. 
2. Might as well not even start right? Or possibly hearing from a friend, family member, rando on the internet saying it’s hard and impossible to achieve so why bother.. even if it would make you happy. Or it could be someone or a voice in your head saying you can’t follow through on this action for whatever reason. 
3. You feel like you aren’t worthy of the possible outcome of completing that task or achieving that goal. Or you don’t have the stamina or strength to start and get going. Both are lies. Or is it something else?

Ways to help : 

1. Work on showing up for yourself more. What can you do to help yourself follow through? Is it breaking the goal or vision down more so it’s easier to achieve? 
   
   For example, for my health journey of wanting to run 10 miles, I started off with showing up for myself by walking at least 5 mins a day and I needed to do do this for 70% of the week (at least 5 out of the 7 days I had to walk) in the beginning and as I proved to myself that I can spare 5 mins a day for my health and goals, I then increased my time to 10 mins a day for 70% of the week and so on. 
   
   Start small to give yourself a chance to prove that you are worthy of your goals because you’re showing up and doing the work​
2. Journal to dig deep into why you feel that way? Who made you think this about yourself? Someone or something made you feel like this because babies don’t just come out of the womb self doubting. If you look at most healthy toddlers, they have a sense of wonder and curiosity and desire to act. So something or someone along the way made you shrink down or feel like you do now. I will be coming out with a downloadable worksheet soon to help you guide you deeper into your thoughts to see where they stem from.
3. Therapy, if you have a lot of trauma or shame based experiences, I highly suggest trying to see a therapist that’s right for you. Or if therapy is too expensive right now, start reading self help books and do the exercises that they have in them. That’s what I did for the first few years on this journey before getting a therapist. If you have shame (which 90% of adults do) I highly suggest “Healing the shame that binds you”, if you have immature parents then maybe start with “Children of immature parents” or whatever topic is hurting inside, see what best books are out there on the topic (preferably by a therapist or trusted author) to get started. 
4. Meditations and/or subliminals, I personally love both of these but instead of relying on myself for what to do during the meditation, I look for a guided meditation that I watch in full first to make sure that it is right for me to go on then will watch it a 2nd time if it fits and do the meditation. 
   
   For subliminals - which are affirmations or statements that are said at the subconscious level and layered with binaural beats on top of it. There are a lot of trusted youtube channels (myself included) that have wonderful subliminals to listen to. Before you offer up your mind though, please read through the comments to see how others react to it. If lots of “I felt weird”, “My mood was off” or other comments that rub you the wrong way then pass and move on to another one. I did experience headaches the first few times when listening and I suggest that if that does happen to you, do it in small rounds. It’s very weird if your subconscious has never been contacted before.
   

The headaches do go away but if you start to develop a bad mood or migraines, that video or creator is not for you and keep track of them to not listen to. It might be that they don’t know what they’re doing and messing something up in the edit or some bad people are out there. It’s most likely people messing up or using words that you don’t understand because they’re gibberish (one subliminal was talking about a random planet I never heard of lmao so of course my subconscious was like gurrl wtf). 

#2 - You avoid going in the right direction.

When given two options, one in the right direction and the direction that pushes you back, you often find yourself going down the wrong path at that moment.

Example would be when you end up texting that person who you know is going to end up hurting you because that’s what they usually end up doing even though you know you shouldn’t and that your mental health would benefit from some distance (family, friend or significant other). Instead of focusing on you and your happiness, you end up self sabotaging by checking on that person and making their emotions a priority instead of your own. 

This does tie into people pleasing which is another form of self sabotage. It’s a huge topic that I dedicated a whole guide on that you can read here. Solving this one issue helps make all of these other tendencies easier to tackle if you think you are a people pleaser.

Reason : On some level you don’t feel worthy of peace and happiness.

1. Our subconscious mind is used to a set level of predictable circumstances and when you are given a new path that’s beneficial, you end up going down the familiar path of pain and antigrowth because you know you will “survive”. Our subconscious minds are only here to keep you alive, not thrive. It was a safety net for when we lived in caves and survival was unpredictable but we no longer live like that. But our subconscious doesn’t understand that. It’s only goal is to make sure you live another day and not if you are happy. The subconscious is only worried about survival and when it can guess what will happen (good or bad) it can guarantee your survival. 
2. This could also stem from someone in your life that made you believe that life is meant to be hard and you’re supposed to feel like shit and that good things don’t happen to people like us. That to “earn” anything in life, you have to struggle. That’s a lie. 

Ways to help : 

1. Journaling is another great way to help dive into where this stems from and show yourself that these beliefs are not yours and were only placed within by someone's pain and experiences. Other people's experiences and pain are not yours to bear. Look for examples of people who are able to achieve whatever it is that you want who do so without needing to break their soul or go against beliefs. 
2. Or go on the journey of why you think you aren’t deserving of success. When did you start to and why do you feel like you can’t succeed or handle the success? Or is it a fear of being seen? Why do you fear being seen? Dive deep into what the root cause is and identify whose voice is the voice in you that says you can’t do it. Because it’s not yours but someone else who said you couldn’t from your past. 
3. Your life is yours to do with and to make new beliefs that suit you and what you want out of life. You can change your reality and I wrote a whole guide about how, that you can read here. I am living proof that you can handle success and that you are deserving of success. One quote I’ve been feeling lately is “There are people out there who have half your talent but 10x the amount of self trust making 5x the amount of money than you are”. And I know this is geared for money but you can attribute it to anything. Someone out there who is doing less and not feeling like you are, are the ones achieving what you want because they have faith in themselves. Have faith and take the chance. We aren’t promised tomorrow so make today count.

#3 - Fear of Failure
One of the strongest, silent, self fulfilling prophecy that makes you think “what’s the point if you are just going to fail” because the fear of looking like a failure is worse than risking the chance of succeeding.

“Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying” - Roy T Bennett
Reason:

Reason:

1. You were ridiculed for not knowing something when you “should’ve” (but looking back….should you have? Was it your first time or were you a little nervous? if yes, then you shouldn’t have been treated like that, more on this in ways to help) or something awful happened by you not getting something right, either to you or someone you loved/protected.
   
2. You “failed” at something to then be punished, made fun of or made to feel awful about yourself. A lot of people are set up to fail right in the beginning by a person who wanted to make sure that you failed. They did that in order to dole out the shame that they were given to them onto you. Because as we all know, misery loves company. 
   

Ways to help : Change your mindset and beliefs around failure by letting these ideals take place in your heart and mind.

1. Failing DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE A FAILURE! It's an action not a being. Don’t confuse an action with who you are. You have to make the choice to identify with the action. Don’t let it make the choice for you.
   
2. Understand that everyone fails and you will find failure throughout your entire life and that is normal. It means you are trying to live life.
   
3. As long as you learn from your failure, it should be taken as a success because now you know something you didn’t before and gained more wisdom.
   
4. Failing is a wonderful journey to go on because that’s where growth happens. You can’t grow in comfort. 
   
5. Anyone who tries to shame or mock or bring you down is battling their own demons that were placed within them by someone else. By deeply knowing and feeling that you are stronger than their attempt to project that pain that they feel in you, the further you’ll go in life.
   

#4 - Chronic Indecision
This sneaky lil hoe likes to cause grand anxiety and hold you back in so many ways while disguising as protection. By not believing you are able to achieve this goal, consciously or subconsciously, you get stuck in analysis paralysis. 
Constantly researching and reading and watching hours and hours of content around a subject for fear of missing out on the best way of doing something because you don’t want to “waste time” or “start off not being efficient” or “mess up by following the wrong advice”.
The best way of doing something is just starting one way and then when you come across something that you don’t know what to do, you research that specific topic, test out the method you found and go from there.
You end up saving so many hours of wasted “learning” when you could’ve made substantial progress on your goal.
Reason : 

1. You don’t have confidence in your ability to either learn something or smart enough to figure it out. OR you’re worried about going down the wrong path or the least optimal path or not knowing all the secrets and hacks before getting started and wasting your time. Without even realizing that you are already wasting time by watching videos that for the most part are a lot of fluff or repeat the same topics as the last four videos you watched.
   
2. Or this could be a fear of being seen or fear of what success will bring. Including loosing people around you because a lot of people don’t want others to beat them to living a better life.
   
   Ways to help :
   
3. I promise you there are people who are “dumber” than you are and figuring it out.
   
4. You just need the confidence to allow yourself the ability to show up and give it a chance.
   
5. This is something I struggle with everyday but slowly getting better at. Instead of watching 100 videos on how to get started on something, I limit it to 2-3 then only rewatch those videos until I’ve mastered whatever they are teaching you in those videos. Then once I master that, I can move onto whatever other videos I want to after.
   This allows me the chance to actually try out the methods and see if they work for me and actually make progress.
   
6. Understand that by making no decision you are making the WORST decision. Any decision can be better than not picking one and waiting. You can learn from each action you take. 
   
7. If it helps, ask yourself this question, “What would my life look like if I made this decision” and then go off what would be better even if by a 1% difference. The quicker you act, the better you’ll be. 
   
8. Understand that there is no universal right way to do anything. Only that there is a perfect way for you and it might not be the popular method. Take organizing your home. The popular method is having everything color coded and alphabetized and in a million different sub-organized containers. But there is this wonderful little book on organizing that is based completely around your personality and what will work best for you and what you should do. I loved this book and it offered me such relief, called The Clutter Connection: How Your Personality Type Determines Why You Organize the Way You Do.
   
   
   How to change your mindset
   Understand what your trigger is that is causing your sabotaging tendencies. Whenever you find yourself self sabotaging, take a moment to reflect on what emotion or energy is causing you to do this. 
   Please be judgment free here, this is your first time going through life so it’s more than normal to mess up and take a few missteps.
   If you’re afraid of getting hurt again, pause and think if you actually are going to get hurt. If you think you will, how would you and is there any way to help make it so you won’t get hurt?
   Figure out what your core negative beliefs are and assess if they are actually true or just a product of your traumatic past. Ask if it has any business being in the present or should it be buried in the past?
   Do some shadow journal work (I have this topic planned to come out in the following weeks, join the newsletter to get first access!) to get ahead of these tendencies and start to fall in love with you and your flaws.
   Figure out who you are and who you want to be to fuel you to push past your beliefs and make it so hard for you to self sabotage because your dreams and your goals and your self worth are higher and stronger than that old frequency trying to derail your success and happiness.
   Remember to ask yourself, “what could I become and accomplish if I embraced the energy of the goddess within?” because I for one would love to see who you become.
   
   Remember that you are beyond worthy of anything you want in life.
   
   Let’s stick together and cheer each other on my fellow goddess!
   
   I believe in you sweet soul and until next time, I wish you peace, strength and hope.
   
   ~Love Angel